Banta versus Santa

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One day, Banta goes to the clinic, and he finds his friend Santa crying.
Banta: Santa, Why are you crying?
Santa: The doctors are going to take my blood test by cutting my finger.
After hearing this Banta also starts crying.
Santa: Banta, why are you crying?
Banta: I'm here for urine test!
 
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Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song. After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down?
Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.
 
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Santasigh decided to write the MBA exam. He could understand every thing except for the LOGIC part. One day when he was reading, one of his non-sardar friends came home.
Friend: Santasighji How is your MBA preparation?
SantaSingh: Every thing is fine, but I could not understand Logic.
Friend: Logic is very easy.
Santasigh: Can you give me an example, so that I can understand.
Friend: OK. Do you have fish pot in your house?
Santa: YES.
Friend: Logically, there will be water in it.
Santa: YES.
Friend: Logically, there will be fish in it.
Santa: YES.
Friend: Logically, someone will be feeding the fish.
Santa: YES.
Friend: I take a guess that your wife will be feeding the fish.
Santa: YES.
Friend: so, logically, your are married.
Santa: YES.
Friend: So, that means you are a heterosexual.
Santasigh was very glad and he understood logic. Next day he sees Bantasingh and he was also preparing for MBA.
Santa: How is your MBA preparation?
Banta: Everything is fine except for the logic.
Santa: Oh, logic is easy.
Banta: Please, give me an example.
Santa: Do you have a fish pot in your house?
Banta: NO, I don't.
Santa: Saala HOMO!!!
 
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Santa Singh is at the railway station. He asks a man "When will Rajdhani Express go from here?"
Man Replies 12.30.
"When will Deccan Queen go from here?"
Man Replies 11.30.
"When will Punjab Express go from here?"
Man Replies 10.30.
Santa singh goes on asking about all the trains.
Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.
Santa replies, "No I just want to cross the tracks!"
 
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Once one sardar and one pathan were traveling in one train. Sardar was trying to open his suitcase to take out his night dress, but he was unable to open it. Pathan came and opened the suitcase and said " Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai" and went off .
After an hour sardar was busy in opening his lunch box, but he could not open it. Pathan came, opened the box and said "Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai" and went off .
After some time sardar was trying to open the door of the toilet but he could not. Again Pathan came and opened it with one kick and said " Pathan Sher ka bachcha hai"
This time sardar became angry he asked pathan "oye muzhe ek gal bata, teri ma jungle gayi thi ya sher tere ghar aaya tha?" and went off
 
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Three men - an American, a Japanese and Banta Singh were sitting in the sauna. Suddenly there was a beeping sound. The American pressed his forearm and the beep stoped. The others looked at him questioningly. "That was my pager," he said. "I have a microchip under the skin of my arm."
A few minutes later a phone rang. The Japanese lifted his palm to his ear. When he finished he explained, "That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand."
Banta felt decidedly low-tech but not to be outdone, decided he had to do something just as impressive. He steped out of the sauna and went to toilet. He returns with a piece of 'Toilet paper' hanging from his butt. The others raised their eyebrows and said, "Wow! What's that?" "I'm getting a fax," he explains.
 
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