Marriage jokes .... ???

* Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

* Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

* Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

* Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

* It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

* It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives !

* A man who surrenders when he's wrong, is Honest. A man who surrenders when not Sure, is Wise. A man who surrenders even if he's Right, is a Husband.

* Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.

* There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage

* Aadmi shaadi kyon karta hai?
Takee vo marne ke baad agar Swarg jaye to achcha feel kare aur agar Nark jaye to homely feel kare...

* Why do Bride & Groom exchange varmaala during wedding ?
To tell each other affectionately... Sweetheart U R Dead !

* Different Phases of a man:
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman

* There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it. There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbour has it

* Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.

* Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

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