BEER PHILOSOPHY

"Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed.

Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery
and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they
might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, 'It
is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be
selfish and worry about my liver'"

-- Babe Ruth

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"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with
fools."



-- Ernest Hemingway

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"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

-- Paul Hornung

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"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."

-- H.L. Mencken

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"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we
fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"



-- George Bernard Shaw

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"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."



-- Benjamin Franklin

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"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the
wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."



-- Dave Barry

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"Remember, it's "I" before "E", except in Budweiser."



-- Professor Irwin Corey

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"To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a 'support group'. Salvation in a
can!"



-- Leo Durocher

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"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as
fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the
slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural
selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and
health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the
weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate
as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we
know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and
weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer
eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more
efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few
beers."

-- Cliff Clavin