She Gives a missed call to him .. and he calls her back.. |
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Appreciation Accepted: MUST READ FOR LAUGHING
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Saturday, December 19, 2009
how much for the fence
TweetA man strolls into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some condoms.
She asks, ''What size please?''
''Good question," he replies, " I'm not sure,"
''Tell ya what. Right outside, there's a fence with three holes in it,
stick your dick in the holes and tell me which one it fits in,''
suggests the lady.
So he takes her advise, goes outside and puts his dick in the first
hole. A woman walks past, see's his dick and starts feeling it.
The man thinks, ''Hey, this ain't too bad.''
Then he puts his dick in the second hole, another woman walks by, and
gives him a blow job. At this point, he is literally blown away.
He quickly shoves his dick in the last hole, and yet another woman
walks by, and she starts to shag him.
After they are done rocking, he high-steps it back inside and goes to
the counter.
The assistant asks ''What size then?''
"Forget the condoms," says the man, "how much for the fence?"
Who's he going to tell
TweetOne Sunday morning, a priest wakes up and decides to go golfing. He
calls his boss and says that he feels very sick, and won't be able to
go to work.
Way up in heaven, Saint Peter sees all this and asks God, ''Are you
really going to let him get away with this?''
''No, I guess not,'' says God.
The priest drives about five to six hours away, so he doesn't bump
into anyone he knows. The golf course is empty when he gets there. So
he takes his first swing, drives the ball 495 yards away and gets a
hole in one.
Saint Peter watches in disbelief and asks, '' Why did you let him do that?''
To this God says, ''Who's he going to tell?''
Keep Going
TweetSpend 5 minutes in reading the great story underneath.
One day I decided to quit...
I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality. ..
I wanted to quit my life.
I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.
'God', I said. 'Can you give me one good reason not to quit?'
His answer surprised me...
'Look around', He said. 'Do you see the fern and the bamboo?'
'Yes', I replied.
'When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds,
I took very good care of them.
I gave them light. I gave them water.
The fern quickly grew from the earth.
Its brilliant green covered the floor.
Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed.
But I did not quit on the bamboo.
In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful.
And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed.
But I did not quit on the bamboo. He said.
'In the third year, there was still nothing from the bamboo seed.
But I would not quit.
In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed.
'I would not quit.' He said.
'Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth.
Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant. ..
But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall.
It had spent the five years growing roots.
Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive.
I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle.'
He said to me. 'Did you know, my child, that all this time you have
been struggling,
you have actually been growing roots'
'I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you.'
'Don't compare yourself to others.' He said.
'The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern.
Yet, they both make the forest beautiful.'
'Your time will come', God said to me. 'You will rise high!'
'How high should I rise?' I asked.
'How high will the bamboo rise?' He asked in return.
'As high as it can?' I questioned.
'Yes.' He said, 'Give me glory by rising as high as you can.'
I left the forest and bring back this story.
I hope these words can help you see that God will never give up on you.
He will never give up on you.
Never regret a day in your life.
Good days give you happiness;
Bad days give you experiences;
Both are essential to life.
Keep going....
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
If seen the movie " Wednesday"...( Rephrased) for all the engineers...
TweetProject Manager Rathore : kaun ho tum..??? kya pehcan hai tumhari ?
Unkonwn Caller : Kaun hoon mein...mein vo hu jo aaj committment karne se darta hai, Mein vo hoon jo aaj ghar jaane se darta ha, ye soch ke kahin ghar wale pehchanne se inkar na kar de...
mein vo hoon jo, aaj job change karta hai to sochta hai ki kahin recession mein mujhe company se na nikal de..
mein vo hoon jiski girlfriend usse friday ko dus bar phone karti hai, "kya kar rahe ho..?? kaam jyada hai..?? thak gaye ho..?? "
mera haal poochne ke liye ya kaam poochne ke liye nahi, rathore saab... balki vo ye jaanaa chahti hai ki... kahin hamesha ki tarah end moment pe
boss ke bulane pe mein saturdary ki date cancel to nahi kar raha...
mein vo hoon jo breakfast ke time pe dinner karta hai, lunch time pe breakfast karta hai, dinner ke time pe lunch karta hai.. vo bhi time mil jae to...
mein vo hoon jo aksar phasta hain
kabhi Interviews ke sawaal mey phasta hai , kabhi Badi companiyon ke jaal mey phasta hai, kabhi boss aur client ke bawaal mey fasta hai.
Walk-In ki bheed to dekhi hogi aapne rathore saab... us bheed mein se ko bhi chehra chun lijie.. mein vo hoon..
I'm the…..STUPID SOFTWARE ENGINEER....
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Does heart have legs
TweetLittle Johnny once asked his teacher "Does heart have legs?."
The teacher answered "Why do you ask that?"
Johnny replied "Yesterday, I heard my dad say sweetheart open your legs.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Specialist Advice by Little Johnny
TweetWednesday, August 26, 2009
Fwd: Power of Media and News ChaNneLs
TweetThe year is 2020 and India's much awaited MAN-ON-THE-MOON mission is successful. The first Indian astronaut lands on the moon. The moment he steps his foot on moon he is shocked to see 2 Indians already present on the moon.
The astronaut asks them : "Who are u?"
Reply:
"Cameraman Santosh ke saath Deepak Chourasiya…...AAJ TAK"
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Dimag ka shottttttttttt
Tweetlog
maane.........judwaa.
Lekin dono main fark bole to solid. Julie
ekdum
Smart,
bole to jhakaas rapchik piece aur Sulie bole
to
ekdum halki re.
To kya hota hai maloom Sulie thee bachpan
se,
woh kya bolte hain
usko..Stubborn ..bole to ekdam yedi,
jiddi....
rehti hai.
To julie jo bhi maangti hai na...Sulie ko woh
maangta-ich hai.
Julie ko gudiya mili to Sulie ko bhi maangta tha...
Julie ko kangan mila to Sulie ko bhi mangta hai.....
Aisa karte karte bees saal guzar gaya.
To na, Julie ka shaadi ekdum karodpati ladka
ke saath
hota hai. Aur Sulie ek fatichar funtoosh se shaadi banatha hai.
Shaadi ke baad Julie Fridge leti hai baap.
Sulie bhi pati se fridge maangtihai.
Pati salla bechara garibmanus.
Lekin biwi ko khush karne ke waaste woh Fridge
khareed leta hai.
Abhi Julie agle mahine Air Conditioner khareed
dalti hai.
Sulie bhi jidd karti hai baap.
Kya Bolti Malum: AC nahin liya to khud ko tapka daloongi.
Pati bechara aur paise markeet se udhaar leta hai aur
AC khareed leta hai......! ..
Ab Julie car khareedti hai.
Suliebhi jidd karti hai.
Pati ka dimaag satak-ta hai lekin phir bhi saala karega kya,
baap ka zameen bech dalta hai aur gaadi khareedta hai.
Thode dinon ke baad Julie gaadi bech ke bus
khareedti hai. Sulie bhi jidd karti hai.... Abhi pati solid bhadakta hai baap.
Bolta hai "Ae item, ab dhimaag ka dahi mat bana..bahut ho gaya tera
natak. Abhi apun tera ek nahin sunega. Apun jaa rahela hai kya, yeda
samjha hai kya, To Sulie ko shorke woh chala jaata hai.
Sulie lekin apni gaadi bechkar aur paisa market
se uthakar bus khareed
leti hai......
To Julie aur Sulie apne apne bus main Ek din picnic ko jaata hai.
Bus ko park karke ! woh log ghoomne phirne ko jaata hai.
Wapas aake dekhta hai to saala dono bus main steering wheel gaayab,seat
gaayab, gear gaayab...sab kuch ghayab!!
Sulie julie ko dekhti hai aur kuch to bolti hai...........
Abhi Ekdum simple koschan: Sulie Julie ko
kya bolti hai??
* * Ye tu bhol-na * * * * *
* * * Abe soch...... * * *
* * * dhimag kaam nahi kar rehla hai kya? * * *
* * * Haar maan gaya kya??? * * *
* * * Accha chal bolich dalt hoon: * * *
" NA KUCH TERE BUS MEIN JULIE........ NA KUCH
MERE BUS MEIN..."
ae bhidu log, apun ko gaali nahi dene ka kya ?
aur apun ke upar gussa nai karne ka?
Apun ko bhi kisi ne subeh subeh yeh bhej kar apna bheja kharab kiya hai. Tere ko lage to tu bhi kisi ka
bheja kharab kar. par apun ka
nahi............samja kya.........!!!
Friday, July 10, 2009
Story.............ek lady aur tota(parrot).....
TweetEk din ek lady shop se parrot kharidne gyi....
Usne dukandar se kaha Wasim bhai ek tota chahaiye....
Dukandar ne usse ek tota dikaya.................
Lady ne pucha is tote ki khas bat kya hai Wasim bhai...
Dukandar bola ye tota bolta hai………………………
Lady ne kaha acha………………….
Usne tote se pucha main tumhe kaisi lagti huin?
"Bahen ki laudi randi lagti hai" tote ne kaha.
Lady ne kaha wasim bhai ye to bhut badtamij tota hai gali deta hai.
Vasim bhi use ander le gya aur pani me dubaya aur pucha...
Gali dega...
Tota. Hain dunga
Vasim ..phir dubaya aur pucha .gali dega"
Tota... hain dunga....
Vasim ne phir pani me dubaya aur kaha .gali dega..
Is bar tota maan gya aur kaha nahi dunga bhai nahi dunga,,,,,
Vo use bahar le gya aur lady se kaha ye ab gali nahi dega…………
Tab lady ne usse pucha ...
Agar mere ghar pr mere sath ek aadmi aye to tum kya sochoge.
Tote ne kaha..ki tumhara pati hoga..
Lady..agr do aadmi aye to kya.
Tota.tumhara pati aur devar,
Lady.agr tin aadmi ..
Tota.tumhara pati ,devar,aur bhayiya.
Lady ...agr char aadmi aye to...
Tota.....
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,.,
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,.,.
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,.,
.,
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.,.
,.,
.
,.,
.,
.,Wasim bhai pani lao...
Maine to pehle hi kaha tha ki
"Behen ki laudi Randi hai".
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Thursday, June 11, 2009
God and baniya...!!!
TweetFriday, April 24, 2009
Man Rules - Ladied Follow them strictly
TweetThe Man Rules Finally , the guys' side of the story. Now here are the rules from the male side. 1. Men are NOT mind readers.
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear ' the rules '
From the female side
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down..
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solvin g it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it you r self.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT n eed directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, i t will be scratched..
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can -
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Interview Questions
TweetThursday, April 09, 2009
How to identify indians
Tweet1. Everything you eat is savored in garlic, onion and tomatoes.
2. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil..
3. You are always standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the
Airport.
4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think it's normal.
5. You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to stamp.
6. You recycle Wedding Gifts, Birthday Gifts and Anniversary Gifts.
7. You name your children in rhythms (example, Sita & Gita, Ram &
Shyam, Kamini & Shamini.)
8. All your children have pet names, which sound nowhere,
close to their real names.
9. You take Indian snacks anywhere it says 'No Food Allowed.'
10. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.
11. You load up the family car with as many people as possible.
12. HIGH PRIORITY ***** You use plastic to cover anything new in your house
whether it's the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch.
13. Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think, but they
won't let you do certain things because of what the other 'Uncles and
Aunties' will think.
14. You buy and display crockery, which is never used, as it is for special
occasions, which never happen.
15. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.
16. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
17. You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as
possible.
18. Your kitchen shelf is full of jars, varieties of bowls and plastic utensils
(got free with purchase of other stuff)
19. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel
(and travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes).
20. You own a rice cooker or a pressure cooker.
21.. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
22. You live with your parents and you are 40 years old. (And they prefer it
that way).
23. You don't use measuring cups when cooking.
24. You never learnt how to stand in a queue.
25. You can only travel if there are 5 persons at least to see you off or
receive you whether you are traveling by bus, train or plane.
26. If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing whose
daughter has run with whose son and feel proud to spread it at the velocity of
more than the speed of light.
27. You only make long distance calls after 11p.m.
28. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if
you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
29. You call an older person you never met before Uncle or Aunty.
30. When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover
you're talking to a distant cousin.
31. Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign
countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of
their lungs when making foreign calls.
32. You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them
from getting dirty.
33. Its embarrassing if you're wedding has less than 600 people.
34. All your Tupperware is stained with food color.
35. You have drinking glasses made of steel.
36. You have mastered the art of bargaining in shopping.
37. You have really enjoyed reading this mail - forward it
to as many Indians as possible.
I STILL LOVE TO BE AN INDIAN
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Baniya Jokes not Little Johnny jokes this time
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Sardaron par bahut jokes suney honge, here are some Baniya Jokes….
Baniya: Yeh kela(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Baniya: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Baniya:Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de
Baniya on his death time.
My wife, where r u ?
Wife:Yes, I'm here
My sons daughters ru all here?
Yes, Papa
Baniya:To phir brabar wale kamre
ka pankha Q khula hay ??? :D:D:D
Baniya 14th floor se neche gira
Girte waqt usne
apni ghar ki khirki me
apni wife ko roti pakate hue dekha
to chilla k bola
MERI ROTI NAHI PAKANA!
Baniya ne jat ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.
jat ne usay MERCEDEZ gift kardi.
jat ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari,
Baniya ne phir khoon dia.
Ab k bar jat ne till waly laddu gift kiye,
Baniya:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?
jat:Munna…!! Ab hamarey ander bhi baniye ka khoon dor raha hay:)
Baniya called a newspaper office and asked: Mera Chacha Mar gaya hai,
kya charges hongay?
NewsPaper: Rs.50 per word.
Baniya: Oh bohat ziyada hain, Acha likho "Chacha Guzar Gaye".
Newspaper: Sir! It should be minimum 6 words!
Baniya: Oh ho! Jara sochnay do..... Acha likho................ .
Chacha Guzar Gaye - Maruti for Sale .
Baniya ask to Taxi Driver: CP wale gurudware jayega kya?
Taxi Driver: Han jaon ga.
Baniya ne jaib se lunchbox nikala or kaha:
Wapsi main langar ka khana lete aana.
Baniya ko bhoot charh gaya ,
3 din baad bhoot khud ek ojha k paas gaya aur bola,
Ojha sahab mujhe bahar Nikalo..! Warna me to bhookha hi mar
jaon ga
Titanic K Sath Baniya Bhi Doob Raha Tha
Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha
Dost: Oye Hans Kyun Raha Hai?
Baniya: Shukar Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Few Old Joke
TweetA MBA and a BE go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend.
"Look up at the sky and tell me what you see".
The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
Why, what does it tell you?"
The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks.
"Practically. ..someone has stolen our tent".
" ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE "
Lateral Thinking (MUST READ)
Tweet
man
Q1. ---------
board
Okay, let's see if you've got the hang of it.
stand
Q2. ------------
i
Ans. = I understand
OK .. . .
Got the drift ?
Let's try a few now and see
how you fare ?
Q3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/
Ans. = reading between the lines
Q4. r
road
a
d
Ans. = cross road -->
Not having a good day now, are you ?
Redeem yourself.
Q5. cycle
cycle
cycle
Ans. = tricycle
Not easy to figure out ha!
0
Q6. ---------
M..D.
Ph.D.
Ans.. = two degrees below zero
C'mon give it a little thought! !
knee
Q7. ------------
light
Ans. = neon light
( knee - on - light )
U can prove u r smart by getting this one.
ground
Q8. ---------------
feet feet feet feet feet feet
Ans. = six feet underground
-->
Oh no, not again ! !
Q9. he's X himself
Ans. = he's by himself
Now u messing up big time.
Q10. ecnalg
Ans. = backward glance
Not even close! !
Q11. death ..... life
Ans. = life after death
Okay last chance ..................
Q12. THINK
Ans. = think big ! !
And the last one is real fundoo - - -
Ans. = long time no 'C' -->
Monday, March 23, 2009
malayali jokes
TweetQ: Where did the Malayali study?
A: In the ko-liage.
Q: Why did the Malayali not go to ko-liage today?
A: He is very bissi.
Q: Why did the Malayali buy and air-ticket?
A: To go to Thuubai, zimbly to meet his ungle in the Gelff.
Q: Why do Malayali's go to the Gelff?
A: To yearn meney.
Q: What did the Malayali do when the plane caught fire?
A: He zimbly jembd out of the vindow.
Q: Why did the Malayali go to the concert in Rome?
A: Because he wanted to hear pope music.
Q: How does a Malayali spell moon?
A: MOON - Yem Yo yet another Yo and Yem
Q: What is Malayali management graduate called?
A: Yem Bee Yae.
Q: What does a Malayali do when he goes to America?
A: He changes his name from Karunakaran to Kevin Curren.
Q: What does a Malayali use to commute to office everyday?
A: An Oto
Q: And for cargo?
A: Loree
Q: Where does he pray?
A: Demble
Q: Who is Bruce Lee's best friend ?
A: A Malaya-Lee of coarse.
Q: Name the only part of the werld, where Malayali's dont werk hard?
A: Kerala
Q: Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala?
A: Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting,folding and re-tying the lungi.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Jokes....
TweetMath Class
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing mathproblems when his teacher picked him to answer a question..
"Johnny, if there were five birds sitting ona fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left ?"
"None.", replied Johnny. "'cause the restwould fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher."But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question foryou now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, onelicking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one suckingher cone, which one is married?
Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guessthe one sucking the cone?
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with thewedding ring on her finger.But
I like the way you are thinking..
******************************
Red and Shiny
The teacher, in an attempt to stimulate theirminds, asked the class the following question, " What is bright red andshiny?"
Little Johnny jumped up and shouted, " A fire engine !!!!???"
"No! No!" said the teacher," But I like the way you think.. Anyoneelse?"
Little Susan replied that it was an apple and the teacher was happy except
Johnny of course..
Anyway, Little Johnny asked the teacher if he can ask a question to which
she nodded OK.
" What is long,hard, rounded and has hair atone end? "
"JOHNNY!!!" she screamed, "WE'LL HAVE NONE OFTHAT TALK HERE..."
Johnny replied, " No, it's a toothbrush, butI like the way youthink"..
*******************************************************
A priest is out for an afternoon stroll and turns the corner and finds little Johnny with a hammer smashing the daylights out of
a bunch of ants. The kid is saying to himself, "I hate these fucking ants...I hate these fucking ants."
The priest is taken back by the little boy's language and talks to him, saying that God doesn't make junk.
"Tomorrow I will be coming by again and if you can tell me three things that God created that are worthless, then I will let you
continue killing the ants."
The next afternoon, the priest is out again for his walk and comes upon little Johnny smashing ants again. The priest reminds him of the agreement
that they made saying the boy agreed not to kill any more ants unless he could name three things that God created that are worthless.
Little Johnny looks up with a devilish smile and says, "I do know three things that are totally worthless. The first is a prick on a priest, the
second is tits on a nun, and the third are these fucking ants!"............
Little Johnny trying myspace
TweetLittle Johnny was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine."
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"
The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework."
" And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered.
Infuriated, the called Little Johnny's teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in class?"
The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?"
After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two,the sum of which is four."
Little Johny - Caught the Daddy
TweetLittle Johnny walked into his dad's bedroom one day only to catch him sitting on the side of his bed putting a condom onto his penis in preparation of sex with his wife.
Johnny's father in attempt to hide his full erection with a condom on it, bent over as if to look under the bed.
Little Johnny asked curiously "Whatcha doin daddy?"
His father quickly replied, "I thought I saw a rat go underneath the bed, to which Little Johnny replied
"Whatcha gonna do, f*@#% him?"
Little Johny And his Solutions
TweetThe teacher wrote on the blackboard: "I ain't had no fun in months." Then asked the class, "How should I correct this sentence?"
Little Johnny raised his had and replied, "Get yourself a new boyfriend."
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Cutting Bole Too!!!!!!!!!!
Tweetकटिंग बोले तो ... भारत में दो चीजों को कहते है । अगर आप किसी रेस्टोरेंट में जाते है तो एक ग्लास चाय का जो ऊपर से आधा इंच खाली हो । दुसरा अगर किसी नाई की दुकान में जाते है तो बाल/केश कटाने को । यहाँ हम दुसरे कटिंग की बात कर रहे है ।
आज हमे हमारे मेल पर एक फोरवर्ड मिला । अब ये मत पूछियेगा की फोरवर्ड क्या है । इन्टरनेट पर अगर कुछ सबसे ज्यादा चलता है तो वो है फोरवर्ड । आपको कोई मेल मिला, पसंद आया, भेज दीजिए उसे दस अन्य लोगो को । नहीं पसंद आया तो भी भेज दीजिए, अपना टाईम वेस्ट हुआ तो दूसरो को क्यो बख्शे । तो हमे फोरवर्ड मिला, पसंद आया, तो हमने सोचा इसका हिन्दीकरण कर आप लोगो को फोरवर्ड कर दे।
तो कहानी यूं है ...
एक बुढ़ा नाई था । एक माली उसके पास कटिंग कराने गया । कटिंग के बाद जब पैसे देने चाहे तो नाई ने जवाब दिया :
माफ़ कीजिये में आपसे पैसे नही ले सकता । में समाज सेवा कर रहा हूँ । माली ख़ुशी ख़ुशी दुकान से चला गया ।
अगले दिन जब नाई दुकान पर पहुचा तो दरवाजे पर उसने पाया एक दर्जन खुशबूदार लाल गुलाब और साथ में एक "धन्यवाद" कार्ड ।
एक हलवाई उसके पास कटिंग कराने पंहुचा । उसने भी जब कटिंग के बाद जब पैसे देने चाहे तो नाई ने पैसे लेने से इनकार कर दिया । हलवाई भी ख़ुशी ख़ुशी दुकान से चला गया ।
अगले दिन जब नाई दुकान पर पहुचा तो दरवाजे पर उसने पाया एक दर्जन रस मलाई और साथ में एक "धन्यवाद" कार्ड ।
एक सॉफ्टवेयर इंजिनियर ने कटिंग कराया पैसे देने पर नाई ने पैसे लेने से इनकार कर दिया यह कह कर की वो समाज सेवा कर रहा है ।
अगले दिन जब नाई दुकान पर पहुचा तो जानते है उसने दरवाजे पर क्या पाया ...
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एक दर्जन सोफ्टवेयर इंजिनियर करते हुए फ्री कटिंग का इंतज़ार । सबके हाथ में फोरवर्ड किये गए मेल के प्रिंट आऊट ।
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कहानी खत्म ... अब ये मत पूछियेगा उस मेल में क्या लिखा था ... और उस नाई का पता तो बिल्कुल भी नहीं ...
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