Monday, June 28, 2010

HR Skills -- Choose Heaven or Hell

One day while walking down the street, a highly successful Human
Resources Manager was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul
arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St.
Peter himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in
though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've
never once had a Human Resources Manager make it this far and we're
not really sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do
is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can
choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven",
said the woman

"Sorry, we have rules..."

And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator and it went
down-down-down to hell.

The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting
green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club
and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives
that she had worked with and they were well dressed in evening gowns
and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and
they talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf
and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an excellent
steak and lobster dinner.

She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy (kind n cute) and
she had a great time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a
good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody
shook her hand and waved goodbye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and
found St. Peter waiting for her.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the
next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and
singing. She had great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were
up and St. Peter came and got her.

"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now
you must choose your eternity,"

The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought
I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I
think I had a better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and again she went
down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a
desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends
were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in
sacks.

The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and
there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we
danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage
and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her smiled and told...
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"Yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're an Employee"

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Passbook - Really good one !!

Priya married Hitesh this day. At the end of the wedding party,

Priya's mother gave her a newly opened bank saving passbook.

With Rs.1000 deposit amount.

Mother: Priya, take this passbook. Keep it as a record of your marriage life.

When there's something happy and memorable happened in your new life,
put some money in.

Write down what it's about next to the line.

The more memorable the event is, the more money you can put in.

I've done the first one for you today.

Do the others with Hitesh.

When you look back after years, you can know how much happiness you've had.'

Priya shared this with Hitesh when getting home.

They both thought it was a great idea and were anxious to know when
the second deposit can be made.

This was what they did after certain time:

- 7 Feb: Rs.100, first birthday celebration for Hitesh after marriage

- 1 Mar: Rs.300, salary raise for Priya

- 20 Mar: Rs.200, vacation trip to Bali

- 15 Apr: Rs.2000, Priya got pregnant

- 1 Jun: Rs.1000, Hitesh got promoted

.... and so on...

However, after years, they started fighting and arguing for trivial things.

They didn't talk much.

They regretted that they had married the most nasty people in the
world.... no more love...

Kind of typical nowadays, huh?

One day Priya talked to her Mother:

'Mom, we can't stand it anymore. We agree to divorce.

I can't imagine how I decided to marry this guy!!!'

Mother: 'Sure, girl, that's no big deal.

Just do whatever you want if you really can't stand it.

But before that, do one thing first.

Remember the saving passbook I gave you on your wedding day?

Take out all money and spend it first.

You shouldn't keep any record of such a poor marriage.'

Priya thought it was true.

So she went to the bank, waiting at the queue and planning to cancel
the account.

While she was waiting, she took a look at the passbook record.

She looked, and looked, and looked.

Then the memory of all the previous joy and happiness just came up her mind.

Her eyes were then filled with tears.

She left and went home.

When she was home, she handed the passbook to Hitesh, asked him to
spend the money before getting divorce.

The next day, Hitesh gave the passbook back to Priya.

She found a new deposit of Rs.5000. And a line next to the record:

'This is the day I notice how much I've loved you thru out all these years.

How much happiness you've brought me.'

They hugged and cried, putting the passbook back to the safe.

Do you know how much money they had saved when they retired?

I did not ask.

I believe the money did not matter any more after they had gone thru
all the good years in their life.


"When you fall, in any way, Don't see the place where you fell,
Instead see the place from where you slipped.
Life is about correcting mistakes."